• collapse_already@lemmy.ml
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    2 days ago

    8,000 species of termites survived the flood, implying that Noah had them on his wooden boat. Of course, Noah is an idiot.

    • Comrade_Spood@quokk.au
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      2 days ago

      From my understanding creationists do believe in evolution on a micro level. Meaning a species can evolve a little bit to fit a particular niche. They just don’t believe in evolution on a macro level, meaning like how the surviving dinosaurs evolved into birds as we know it today, or hippos and whales sharing a common ancestor.

        • JackbyDev@programming.dev
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          17 hours ago

          Yes. They focus on there being different prefixes as if that implies there is a different mechanism going on, rather than gradual changes pushing organisms to be more and more different over extremely long periods of time.

          Well, I guess it really isn’t double think depending on how you wanna define double think. It’s more that they insist or misunderstand that macro evolution is not a different set of processes.

  • elbiter@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    The person who posted this was actually trying to sound smart, or is a parody of a moron trying to sound smart?

    • Dave@lemmy.nz
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      2 days ago

      Also, did all the babies that God drowned go to heaven?

      Also you have no idea how happy to hear that Noah, his wife, and his three sons weren’t the only ones on board the ark. The wives of his sons were apparently there as well, otherwise that could have got awkward.

      • anomnom@sh.itjust.works
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        2 days ago

        The babies were born sinners right? So probably not according to the weirdo religion that worships this shit.

    • Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works
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      2 days ago

      Biblical God being as jealous as He is about worshipping only him, Him, burning the money as a sacrifice to Him could have changed His mind about sending the Flood. Only if everyone had joined in, of course. But I guess Noah was better at carpentry than persuasion.

  • MNByChoice@midwest.social
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    2 days ago

    Whoa Whoa.

    The story of Noah’s Ark is not about saving animals. It is about surviving a calamity that one saw coming, AND NOT saving more of humanity. This way one and their children can become insanely wealthy, and nearly the only humans.

    When one needed an elephant, where did they go? To Noah. Need a chicken? Noah! Need help due to your house washing away, killing you and your family? That’s right, Noah!

    • Pacattack57@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      Not far off from the truth. It was about preserving the royal bloodline from Abraham, to David, to Jesus Christ. Also based on archeological data, the flood was a more localized disaster than we realize.

        • Pacattack57@lemmy.world
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          20 hours ago

          It’s a fictional story so the only source is the Bible.

          I mean think about it what was the point of the story? Noah accomplished nothing except saving the animals which God could have done without him. Sure the evil was cleansed but what does that have to do with Noah?

          The reason Noah is significant is because he is a direct descendant of Abraham is is essential to legitimizing David as king and establishing divine right. This also maintains the direct line from Abraham to Jesus Christ which again legitimizes his claims and fulfills all the prophecies about him being a king/prince.

  • ceenote@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    You say he’s an idiot, but at least he’s not as dumb as the carpenters who put their pay from working on the ark into their savings.

  • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    Plutocrats preparing for the apocalypse while staffing every town cryer job in the neighborhood with a guy who screams “Rain has always happened! Flooding is scientifically impossible! The people installing buoys on their homes over there are the reason you haven’t seen the sun in a week.”

  • Lucky_777@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    The whole idea of Noah is insane. No boat could hold all land mammals.

    Plus most would just consume each other during the storms. Noah was probably a boat maker that said he was going to build the biggest boat ever. Then got sidelined by cost and labor.

    Then someone decided to make a story in his honor in an old book of fairy tales.

    • Pacattack57@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      There is textual and historical evidence that Noah’s ark was adapted from the epic of Gilgamesh, which predates Noah’s ark by about 1000 years. So it doesn’t make sense because it’s plagiarized from a story that was never meant to be taken seriously.

      • Dave@lemmy.nz
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        2 days ago

        Wikipedia briefly covers this on the page about Noah, and also talks about a story about Deucalion:

        The story of Noah in the Pentateuch is similar to the flood narrative in the Mesopotamian Epic of Gilgamesh, composed around 1800 BC, where a hero builds an ark to survive a divinely sent flood. Scholars suggest that the biblical account was influenced by earlier Mesopotamian traditions, with notable parallels in plot elements and structure. Comparisons are also drawn between Noah and the Greek hero Deucalion, who, like Noah, is warned of a flood, builds an ark, and sends a bird to check on the flood’s aftermath.

    • MotoAsh@piefed.social
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      2 days ago

      Nahh, reality is far more interesting. There WAS an insanely massive flood over in the middle east. Think like the Bonneville Floods or the Pacific Nothwest flood that happened thousands of years ago big where inland seas had a glaciar/land dam break. The Native Americans have stories of both, and there is ample geologic evidence of them.

      I forgot exactly which region the middle east one flooded out, but it was populated at the time and there are non-religous texts recording some farmer who built basically a giant raft for all of his farm animals, and maybe some other people helped and joined. He mostly just got washed out to sea, but got back to land and … yep, religous people turned it in to gross lies to ‘elevate’ their false knowledge.

      • Simulation6@sopuli.xyz
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        2 days ago

        Or maybe a genetic memory of when the Mediterranean valley became the Mediterranean Sea (way before humans evolved).

        • MotoAsh@piefed.social
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          2 days ago

          lol no. There have been dozens upon dozens of massive flooding events since the Mediterranean Sea has existed. Even many massive vulcanic floods.

          Also the homo genus is ~2.5 million years old. Even some estimates for homo sapiens are nearly a million years old.