So many people see the prompt “what I’m looking for” and write “my keys”.
A. That’s not a terribly funny joke. It’s fine, but not great.
B. It’s not original.
C. You are wasting valuable space. Now the other person has a little less information to make a good opening message. Do you really want that many people messaging you about your keys? Really? Why are you setting yourself up for unhappy outcomes?
Most people don’t think very hard about this, and hope it’ll just work out.
Meetup.com ? They’re still around.
One problem is users are selfish idiots. They won’t go somewhere that doesn’t already have a lot of users. They don’t care that going there now moves it closer to having a lot of users, so in a few months it’ll be good and vibrant. Most people can’t even think an hour ahead.
Another problem is that there are many scammers and bad actors. You need to deal with them, and convince your real users that the scammers are dealt with.
Lastly, in this capitalist hellscape everything is expensive. How are you going to run a big service that’s got low latency and high quality?
Yeah, it can be hard, but many things worth doing are hard. If you start with the bare minimum, the other person’s first impression of you is that you half-assed it. Would you be extra interested in someone who’s too half assed to even read your profile?
Put in the hard work. If you don’t have the energy, don’t use the apps. Half-assing it is just going to make you unhappy.
Except when actually trying to make a match, it’s more advantageous to literally swipe right on everyone to maximize matches and then unmatch if you match with someone you aren’t interested in.
This isn’t true if their system punishes people for swiping “yes” on everyone. While I can’t be certain that’s the case, it seems very plausible it is. Swipe yes on everyone, your profile is down ranked, you don’t get as many good matches.
Additionally, tinder and hinge only allow you a limited number of yes swipes per day. If you blow them on the first ten profiles, you’re going to have worse results than if you spend a little longer looking at profiles.
Furthermore, on hinge, you can send a message with your like. Your chances of having a conversation and date go way down without a good message.
Thinking about my friend group, about half the people met their long term partners on dating apps. The other half is a mix of work and large social groups (eg: people who all go to certain kinds of music festivals)
I guess it varies by age and region.
While meeting partners through personal networks is still the most common kind of introduction, about one-in-ten partnered adults (12%) say they met their partner online. About a third (32%) of adults who are married, living with a partner or are in a committed relationship say friends and family helped them find their match. Smaller shares say they met through work (18%), through school (17%), online (12%), at a bar or restaurant (8%), at a place of worship (5%) or somewhere else (8%).
Some other sources I’m seeing say it’s as high as 60% of couples met online.
I think dating apps are mostly used for hookups
This isn’t especially true. Maybe Feeld and Tinder are less “serious”, but the idea of dating apps is mainstream enough that you find all sorts of people and goals.
The capitalism and for-profit nature does make them all kind of suck, though
The top of the funnel I could see an argument for not putting a lot of thought in. You’re just trying to get a pool of potential matches. (The apps are cruel for making you pay for this and not just giving you the list up front)
But once you do have a match, you have to put in some effort to stand out. A lot of people get a match and all they write is “hey”, and then they go right into the trash. Why would I engage with someone who just wrote “hey” when I could instead talk to someone who read my profile and said something personalized?
Also swiping yes on everyone might do strange things to their recommendation algorithm. Unfortunately that’s a black box, but I wouldn’t be surprised if that puts you in some sort of chum bucket shadow ban situation.
And also, yeah, making you pay for basic filters is a trashy design. Match group should be broken up.
Most of the apps are trashy and don’t optimize for good matches.
At the same time, many users half-ass using them, or deploy a variety of self-sabotage. (No, it’s not that you’re not tall or hot or whatever. It’s more likely your impersonal message didn’t warrant a response)
These two facts together mean a lot of people have truly bad outcomes.
Cool. Been on Pop!_os for a year or so. Not memorable issues. Plays games fine.
Microsoft should be broken up. Even if they walk back some of their AI slop, they’re too big. They don’t fail like they should for releasing a bad product.
As others have said, working from home has many benefits
The commute alone is pretty big. If your commute is like an hour, that’s changing your salary from like $x / 10 hours to $x / 8 hours. That’s a big bump. If your daily pay was $1000, that’s like going from $100/hour to $125/hour.
Not good.
They could be ignorant and not understand how politics affects pretty much everything.
They could be foolishly cynical and think that “none of it matters”, so they just don’t pay attention.
They could be like pathologically avoidant and don’t want to talk about a potentially disharmonious topic.
They could have shitty views they don’t want to talk about.
Not good. Not good people.
I don’t understand how my coworkers are using windows. Like, they routinely have issues where it randomly reboots or gets sluggish. And it’s just flat out unfit for software development, unless you’re targeting windows specific stuff. They can’t even run our code locally.
Maybe some of the problems are janky security stuff to try to lock it down
Many complaints against prostitution also apply to trading labor for money/shelter in general. People just have a stronger emotional response.
Emotional responses are rarely a good foundation for policy.
Prostitution should be legal with safety regulations. All labor should have protections, unions, and such, to protect them from being abused by the wealthy.
Some specific things would probably remain illegal or disallowed, in the same sense that you’re not allowed to work construction without safety gear. People can wear condoms as easily as hard hats and hi-viz vests.
It helps that I’m not a picky or demanding eater. I make a cup of rice in my rice cooker, get some canned beans, and throw in a random assortment of spices and/or condiments. Not afraid to try some weird combinations.
Every accusation is a confession, right?
I’ve been feeling okay on the beans, peanut butter, and sometimes peas.
If you have cheap vegetarian options I’m open to recommendations
Left to my own devices it’d be about $100/month.
Rice, beans, pasta, peanut butter, oatmeal, and then whatever fruit and vegetables are cheap.
With the social life included, there’s more expenses. Did dinner out last week for $60 (a nice local Thai place). Ordered a pizza with a friend who was feeling down and watched Star Trek together for like $30.
Other non-rice meals with my partner can also be more expensive. We air-fried up some potatoes and vegan “meat” last night and it was good.
There’s an app called “too good to go” that lets you get cheap food near the end of day. It’s stuff the restaurant or grocery was going to have to throw out. Sometimes you get like four slices of pizza for $4, or a platter of Korean food for $6. Seems good and not enshittified yet.
I’m in NYC, for context.
The young adult and youth experience in the UU church was pretty great. Less church-y, more interactive. I made a lot of good friends when I was younger there.
That’s my point. They’re doing a self-sabotage. Some of them will then complain that they’re not getting good matches and messages, but a big factor is they’re not giving potential good matches anything to work with.