• potatopotato@sh.itjust.works
    65·
    2 days ago

    Don’t forget the Epstein files where it turns out they’re simultaneously trafficking and raping people while they do their tax evasion.

    • SeeMarkFly@lemmy.mlEnglish
      17·
      2 days ago

      Elizabeth Holmes made the critical error of stealing from rich people

      Remember her court testimony?

      First admitting she was CEO, and now claiming that she was just acting CEO.

      But Ms. Holmes… did you not start this company?

      “I swear to god, I was extremely incompetent. I had no clue what I did day in, day out. It’s all just a blur. I’m not even sure why they hired me honestly.”

      “Fuck if I know what I did on my years-long coke bender”

      “Not only am I a bad judge of who a good employee might be, but I’m also a bad employee. It’s truly the worst situation, Your Honor.”

      “I was self-employed and my boss was an incompetent jerk.”

      “Seems to be a huge problem in self-employment. I’m self-employed, or was until my asshole boss got in a car accident in my car and somehow blamed the whole thing on me! Fucker is a procrastinator too.”

      “I’ve already punished myself with a pay cut.”

      “Look no reasonable person would have hired me, thus I’m clearly mentally unwell”

      “I’m gonna sue my ass for what I did to me!”

      “I am just a low-level CEO, I really just made the coffee.”

      “As I said, I was incompetent. I should never have hired me.”

  • merc@sh.itjust.works
    81·
    2 days ago

    The problem is that most of what was done in Panama was legal. They were avoiding taxes, not evading taxes.

    If they were breaking the law, they could be hauled into court. But, if they’re following the law, but using loopholes which should be illegal, then the only solution is to close those loopholes.

    Then it’s a case of millions of people who care just a little bit about having these loopholes closed, but have other priorities like gun violence, global warming, abortion rights, government spying, affordable groceries, not to mention their jobs, their families, their kids, etc. On the other side, there are a few dozen lawyers and lobbyists who are paid to make keeping those loopholes open, or opening new ones their #1 priority for a minimum of 8 hours a day every day. It’s no surprise that the side with money wins this one.

  • tamal3@lemmy.world
    6·
    2 days ago

    Apparently they’re hiding funds in the baptist church, too, as overheard on an airplane.