01:15 (AM that is, but using 24 hour time format doesn’t need AM/PM) here… zero sleep, listening to a bunch of depression music… :/
Living with family (family of origin, that is) but half of my family members are away… especialy mom…
You only learn to appreciate someone¹ once they’re gone… this time for 30 days… one day its gonna be forever… 🥺 (¹mom that is, Idk how to feel about older brother, still haven’t fixed the broken relationship since those series of fights about 7-9 years ago… )
Mom’s so busy with my brother’s marriage plans, haven’t have much time to talk to me. Idk what to even say on the phone… I just wanna hear her voice… I kinda have a panic attach if i don’t hear her voice or if she takes too long to respond…
I’m just feeling very suicidal rn
just had a brush with ideation because I feel like a shit mom, always fun. Was reading articles on his disorder just now cuz he got in trouble again.
it breaks my heart.
tomorrow is another day, and life is a forever transition.
oh and also agree with the other commentors, youre a part of our comminity, you cannot leave us!