This despite society’s frequent demand to “Know your ABCs”.

I bet OP invented this mysterious friend just to get some good recommendations!

Yeah, I liked how well spoken and well reasoned it was; they politely said something they could have said in a much more acerbic way.

(Not saying I agree with them either.)

Technically correct, the best kind of correct.

Love it, this is now the title.

It was in elementary school. We had a multiple choice test and we had to check the circles next to the right answers with an x.

Instead, I put smiley faces in all the right circles and “frowny” faces in the wrong ones and was very proud of the whole sheet. I didn’t really get into trouble, but the teacher was mildly upset and I think I had to go over it to do it the “right” way :(

Thanks for the inspiration!

A group of Fn keys, lazing in the water.

I wouldn’t mind if the title wasn’t meant to lure you in under false pretenses.

It makes it seem as though OP is thinking about writing a song to a loved one, and only when you open the post you see what it is actually about.

Would be interesting to see the breakdown by country (but difficult privacy-wise).

Usually 2 - 4 times a week, I’d say. (Germany)

Think again, Jimmy. You see, the pickles that you like so much are made with - yep, vinegar.