I haven’t had a Tv in years but not because I wanna be cool or some shit but I don’t want to have one of these intrusive machines in the middle of my house. I already have enough of those.

Edit: NOT because 🫣

A few more inches and the balls will be up there too.

Siri: “sure! I’ll go right ahead and permanently delete everything.”

He’s doing it for the whales. Everyone knows they hate the windmills. /s

Bioscope

Slow Horses.

Are you on the Temu or the Amazon so that I can get some good boot straps and choke myself to ejaculation?

That water was in its way to somewhere, though. What is that other area gonna look like now that this device intercepts the water?

Solid strategy. You can’t kill me if I’m already dead! #checkmate ♟️

The other option was “Operation We Fuck Kids”.

TIL! It’s fucking bananas that I never knew this.

Resident CUTIE

Hell yeah! Thanks for that. I’ll check it out for sure.

Actual quote? Genius either way!

Doctors? You mean dentists?

The USB port should’ve given away that it wasn’t an ice cream sandwich.

70 is when you each have half thumb in each others ass.

Not if Peckerhead Pete has anything to say about it.

His name is Johnson.

LUAP. That’s the sound the FIFA tongue makes passing over Trump churro cutter.